Venting, venting …..

June 24, 2014

Two more local bookstores want to carry my books and promote the books.  Maybe have a book signing at both stores!  That’s something that I have always wanted to do.  In fact one bookstore manager from Spring Green is coming to my house to pick up the books.  But I needed to order more books.  An article is coming in the Wisconsin State Journal along with book reviews.  Perfect timing.  My publisher emails me each day book discounts which change every day.  My publisher sent an email to buy books for five cents a book.  Good deal.  Mom doesn’t want to buy books.  She gives me an excuse saying her credit card is low.  I never ask for anything, but when I try to do book promotions I have to argue with her.  She has no idea how much work I do on publicly.  I have give my books to people to get articles and book reviews.  It’s so frustrating!  She bought the books after I complained.  That’s my life.  When I go out anywhere, Mom gets so hyper that I don’t want to go out.  Yesterday I went to the Historical Museum with my attendant for a few hours to escape my writing projects.  The bus arrived a half hour early and my attendant wasn’t here yet.  Mom panicked!  I wasn’t worried, but she went out to talk to the bus driver making sure that the bus stayed.  My attendant arrived on time.  Then Mom wanted to show my attendant who has worked for me for over a year how to disengage my electric wheelchair.  Going out has begun to make me nauseous, but I need to get out to clear my head.  I don’t want to become a recluse scared to leave the house.  Mom doesn’t understand what she’s doing when she does this.  It’s funny.  My attendants and friends laugh about it.  It’s very sad.  Mom raised me to be independent, but the older that I become the less she wants me to be independent.  Strolling down State Street is a rare opportunity for me that I cherish.  I know it’s time for me to move out.  The question is can I do it? 

Life as it is

June 16, 2014

I don’t live like most disabled people do in Madison.  Disabled people in Madison go to work, physical therapy, shopping and recreation events.  I rarely go anywhere.  The bus is never on time.  Mom gets hyper when I leave the house.  When I see the lives of disabled people lead in Madison, it makes me jealous and happy for them.  I wouldn’t trade being a writer anything. 

There are TV commercials advertising disability Social Security benefits.  People are applying for disability when their unemployment runs out.  It is draining disability Social Security putting it in jeopardy.  Some disabled people can’t work like the cognitively disabled.  If people want to apply for disability Social Security benefits, then make people follow the rules that I have to obey.  You still have to work, but you can’t make more than nine hundred dollars a year.  You can’t have over two thousand dollars in your savings account.  People won’t hire or pay you.  Some people need to think twice about applying for disability Social Security benefits.  Leave disability Social Security benefits for those who needed the most.  My advice to lazy people looking for a handout: get a job!